The talking
Dear diary, it’s hard to hide a smile when it appears not only on a face but also in a heart. Smiles are contagious, especially when it is her smile.
Today was the 3rd time I met her. I need to. It was another evil plan of mine to meet her lol. No, actually it was not. Last night I did something I knew deep down that it would hurt her a bit. There was a brief moment I was so scared that she would probably not talk to me again. At that moment, I knew what I had to do. I had to tell her why she is important to me. Even though it might be a one-sided feeling (or maybe not?). So, I though I would be at the library all day and end up at a bar somewhere to clear my head. Luckily, I didn’t have to do the second part.
So, what did I told her today? Here is what I told her: in the moment of confusion, trouble, and lots of bad thoughts coming in my head, my passion died. I talked with a ‘counselor’ days before about the things. There was a glimpse of pure happiness when I was telling about who I really want to be and what I love to do. After all these things were lost, I confessed that it was her who brought them back to me. That’s why she became important in my life. Hahaha, what a loser thought somehow. I’m not sure if she understands what I’ve said or not. I’m not a good speaker sometimes. Actually, I have many things to tell her too, but there would be a better time for that.
I guess it’s impossible not to talk about what we had today. Well, we did have a very simple lunch lol. She is so down to earth. +1 point. She is a very good listener and a bit talkative too. +2 points. That little face of her when she smiles is fucking annoying! I really want to do something about that face so bad. I love it when she does that stupid head-shaking or something. Most of all, I thought I was having a date with a dude somehow. That’s +10 for weirdness.
I love it when we’re taking things slow. That’s the best way to embrace good things, I guess.
There are many things and feelings to be told but I’d better keep it inside for now.
PS. Sorry for pulling you to get a hold of you, just think I should do it when I got the chance.
Blue,
Today was the 3rd time I met her. I need to. It was another evil plan of mine to meet her lol. No, actually it was not. Last night I did something I knew deep down that it would hurt her a bit. There was a brief moment I was so scared that she would probably not talk to me again. At that moment, I knew what I had to do. I had to tell her why she is important to me. Even though it might be a one-sided feeling (or maybe not?). So, I though I would be at the library all day and end up at a bar somewhere to clear my head. Luckily, I didn’t have to do the second part.
So, what did I told her today? Here is what I told her: in the moment of confusion, trouble, and lots of bad thoughts coming in my head, my passion died. I talked with a ‘counselor’ days before about the things. There was a glimpse of pure happiness when I was telling about who I really want to be and what I love to do. After all these things were lost, I confessed that it was her who brought them back to me. That’s why she became important in my life. Hahaha, what a loser thought somehow. I’m not sure if she understands what I’ve said or not. I’m not a good speaker sometimes. Actually, I have many things to tell her too, but there would be a better time for that.
I guess it’s impossible not to talk about what we had today. Well, we did have a very simple lunch lol. She is so down to earth. +1 point. She is a very good listener and a bit talkative too. +2 points. That little face of her when she smiles is fucking annoying! I really want to do something about that face so bad. I love it when she does that stupid head-shaking or something. Most of all, I thought I was having a date with a dude somehow. That’s +10 for weirdness.
I love it when we’re taking things slow. That’s the best way to embrace good things, I guess.
There are many things and feelings to be told but I’d better keep it inside for now.
PS. Sorry for pulling you to get a hold of you, just think I should do it when I got the chance.
Blue,
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